I recently added some grammar blogs to my RSS feeds, and now I’m terrified of making a mistake and ending up on one of them. So, sorry, but it might be a little while. I am still working on some cool (but long) posts, such as parts 2 and 3 of the newspaper website series and an article about Denver’s new zoning plan, the light rail, and how it compares to plans to re-make Paris, which has lost much of its charm to suburban sprawl.

So stay tuned-ish, but please don’t submit my writings to any language-focused blogs, k? Unless you think they’re amazing or something, in which case feel free to submit away.

April Fools.

No really, I’m working on some though.

April Fools again.

Actually though, I’ve got time to work on some though now that my week from hell is over.

No seriously, April Fools again. You are so gullible. Gahd.

Now serving you from two convenient locations, http://gabestein.com (main URL), http://imaginaryblogworldblog.com (surreal URL).

I hope you like the new look and content of my blog. The new retro-y design is mostly finished, but I’ll still be making some tweaks as time goes on. I hope you enjoy it for now. For those of you on IE, I’m sorry, but you don’t see my cool new minty-fresh green borders and drop shadows surrounding the posts. I’ll try to make it more compliant, but I highly recommend picking up Firefox in the meantime…and you’ll probably use it all the time.

And now a word from our content: more personal, more interactive, probably on the whole less absurd, bizarre, and funny.

I’ll of course continue with my website reviews, movie critiques, and all that, but I’ll also be adding some of my own creative work, including some scripts, short stories and possibly photos and design works. I’ll also occasionally (but not too often) link to stuff I think is important. However, I’m not about to become a link blog – I’ll always include commentary to keep it fresh and up for discussion.

And speaking of discussion – whoever you are, good reader, I want you to feel free to say anything, critique anything, discuss anything, suggest anything, even if you don’t know me personally or well, even if you think it might be awkward or socially unacceptable. A big part of my goal here is to ignite intelligent and in-depth discussion on any number of diverse subjects. I’ll do my best to make the content thought-provoking, but you’ve got to take a few risks to make that work.

I’m also going to be doing a lot more with Twitter, so go ahead and follow me if you like. The Twitter feed will have both new blogposts and random observations during the day, which will be posted to a daily digest on the blog at the end of the day. You can, of course, always respond with twitter using @gabestein.

Well, it’s late, so I guess that’s about it for now. I think this is going to be a lot of fun, for all of us. I look forward to meeting whoever you are.

Sincerely,

Gabe Stein
gabestein.com

Since this blog is semi-anonymous, I’m going to have to do a bit of randomizing to set the scene for you without giving away my precious identité. Let’s just say I’m around 18-22 years old, we’ll call the age range the “student” range, and I attend a place of higher learning that we’ll call a “University” or “College.”

The story goes like this: At this “College,” I was attending a sort of pedantic talk, or “class,” taught by a knowledgeable professional, who for the purposes of this post we will call the “Professor.” During this “class,” another “student” sitting in front of me had his or her mobile computing device or “laptop” open. On the viewing screen of said “laptop,” this male “student” was engaging in a form of non-verbal web-based communication which will hereafter be referred to as “video chatting.”

At the other end of this “video chat” was another young human, presumably also a “student” and possibly the other “student’s” girlfriend. On the screen, I could see him or her lying down on his or her bed, gazing longingly at the camera on his or her “laptop,” presumably directed towards his or her boyfriend, whom as I have already insinuated, was sitting in front of me. This “student” in front of me was in turn periodically looking up from his or her notes and returning the longing gaze, which I could see in the corner of the “video chatting” screen. Of course, neither of them could communicate verbally, since it would be a socially unacceptable disruption of the “class.” Nonetheless, this constant gazing continued throughout the entire “class.”

At the end of the “class,” as this “student” was packing up his or her notebook, he or she actually kissed the screen (presumably as a gesture directed towards his or her girlfriend) goodbye before closing and stowing the “laptop.”

As I walked out of the “class,” I thought to myself how creepy and clingy it was to actually keep a “video chat” of your girlfriend lying on his or her bed doing nothing open throughout an entire “class,” and it made me realize just how weird some relationships actually are. It may be laudable to try to stay in touch with your significant other via newfangled internet communication, but during “class,” really?! Is that necessary? I mean, it’s not like the two of you can talk to each other, so basically it’s just pure voyeurism, unlike what I was doing spying on the pair, which was in the interest of.. science and blogging.

Anyhow, I’m going to attempt to assimilate some knowledge via the reading of instructional material now, or “study,” so I’ll leave you to your thoughts. Feel free to comment on whether or not you feel this is creepy, your own experiences with strange relational communicative practices (be it your relationship or those of others), etc.

Hey. It’s been a few days. I know you’ve missed me, but don’t worry, I’m still here, doing what I do. I haven’t posted in a few days, that much is true, but it’s not because of negligence or anything, I just haven’t been inspired lately. Sometimes the world is far too real to be creatively engaging. So it’s really it’s fault, not mine. But I want to get to the larger issue here. The thing is, I haven’t left you, but I want to let you know that when I do, you’ll know. For certain. Here’s why.

I don’t mean to be arrogant about it, but let’s collect all the facts here. There’s no one else steering the ship. There’s no blog God watching over this thing, nudging us in the right direction with a gust of wind here, a storm there, an impassable straight right smack dab in the middle of our path to the new world. Nope, I’m the guy at the helm. And the guy putting up the sails, and also the guy up in the crow’s nest looking for land (about that impassable straight…brb)

Anyhow, here’s my point: my point is, if I go down, I’m taking the thing with me. I’m shooting a canon off in the belowdecks when I leave. Water is going to fill the hull up pretty darn fast. You’re going to want to have a life vest ready to go. Does that seem selfish? Maybe. But then again, there is no competent and studly first mate ready to take over this boat. That’s the thing about blogging, kids, it’s a lot harder to set up a stable system of ranks and pay-grades than it is in the navy. That’s why most of us don’t bother to have a second on hand just in case the duel I tricked that nasty old pirate into fighting in doesn’t go well.

But here’s the other thing: I don’t want you to worry about it, ’cause I’m not going anywhere soon. I’m in this baby for the long haul, and I hope you are too. We’re going to sail across the world once or twice before anything changes. Why? For Queen and Country. Because we’re dedicated to the seas and our mission. Because we’ve got business with a few privateers. Do I have a guarantee? No, you’ll just have to trust me, like you’d trust any captain. But I haven’t steered us wrong since this voyage started, and you’re still here, so take that how you will.

Yes, she’s well-built and fast, our beauty, with three canon decks on each side, and we’ve only just left port.